TEASER
INT. – CF.NET SHIP – ADMIRAL’S READY ROOM – NIGHT
SIX YEARS AGO…
WARD sits at his desk, staring at a blank computer screen.
Pan around the room and we see the signs of the fierce battle they had fought, broken items, dead monitors lie about.
The door to the ready room opens and GRIMM REAPER enters.
GRIM REAPER
Admiral?
WARD
Don’t call me that.
GRIM REAPER
Excuse me sir?
WARD
I’m not an admiral.
An admiral commands a fleet.
What do I command?
GRIM REAPER
Me, sir.
WARD
(scoffs)
A crew of one…
GRIM REAPER
And this ship, sir. She’s not destroyed.
She’s a tough old bucket and there’s
the possibility of repair…
WARD
An admiral with a single ship and a sole crewmember.
No, Grimm. I’m not an admiral anymore
Call me captain, for it is this ship I command now.
GRIM REAPER
Yes…
(slight pause)
Captain.
(a longer pause)
I’ve brought you something, sir.
GRIMM REAPER brings a box to the WARD’s desk. He sets it down gingerly.
WARD eyes the box, shooting GRIMM REAPER a questioning look.
WARD
What is it?
GRIM REAPER
I managed to extract it from the Archives,
before the Computer gave out. I know it’s
in a primitive medium, but it was all that I
could get, sir. I thought that you might want them…
WARD opens the box to reveal hundreds of small slides. He picks one up and looks at it, a smile suddenly appearing upon his previously morose face.
WARD
I can’t believe it.
GRIM REAPER
Back in the War you told me something.
There’s always a reason to fight on, there’s
always a reason to not give up. Whether
it be family, love, hope, belief. There’s
always something to keep fighting for.
WARD
Thank you, Grimm.
Thank you very much.
GRIM REAPER
It is my pleasure, sir.
WARD gets up from his desk.
WARD
Tell me something, Grimm.
GRIM REAPER
Anything, sir.
WARD
What’s keeping you in the fight?
GRIM REAPER
Belief sir.
I believe in you.
WARD pauses a moment, his bearing suddenly becoming straighter.
WARD
Our ship is nearly destroyed.
We are lost in the Multiverse.
But we have a mission. There’s
a monster out there that needs
to be destroyed. And We will
find it and we will destroy it.
GRIM REAPER
(grinning)
Yes, sir.
CUT TO OPENING CREDITS
An Alternatehistory.com Presentation:
AH.COM: The Series
“ONCE MORE INTO THE BREECH”
Written By : PSYCHOMELTDOWN
ACT I
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – BATTLE ROOM – DAY
The crew is gathered, all looking hollow eyed and exhausted. DOCTOR WHAT looks at each of them.
DOCTOR WHAT
Report.
DAVE HOWERY
Shift engine’s shot. Take days to fix it.
I can get you in system drives by the end of the day…
But we’ve also taken some damage to the reactor, the
thing could go critical if we strain it too much.
GBW
Scanners are out. We can’t see anything.
Shields are down, all the generators are blown.
DAVE HOWERY
We have one more in storage.
God, we’re running through them fast…
WEAPON M
Weapons are down. The particle cannons
look to be salvageable. But the launch tube’s
shot to hell. We’ll be lobbing nothing anytime soon.
DOCTOR WHAT
The A.S.S.H.A.T?
WEAPON M
It’s okay. Tough little thing.
Though the only way we’re gonna
launch it is if we shove it out of an airlock.
G.BONE
Leo’s down. His core was damaged
in the attack. It’ll take a while to fix him.
DAVE HOWERY
Without Leo, we can’t shift anyway.
Along with targeting, navigating…
DOCTOR WHAT
(rubbing weary eyes)
Okay. Main things first.
Get us shields, weapons, impulse,
and Leo back online.
DAVE HOWERY
Psycho and I can handle the engines.
GBW
I can replace the shield generator.
G.BONE
I can fix up Leo, but it might take a while.
WEAPON M
Figure I can fiddle with the particle cannons
and see what happens.
DOCTOR WHAT
Good. We got jobs. Get to it.
We may be in an unfriendly place.
Everyone leaves and DOCTOR WHAT hangs his head in exhaustion.
INT. – CF.NET SHIP – BATTLE ROOM – DAY
The crew is gathered.
GEDCA
We’ve got weapons back on line.
We’ve got shields back up to minimum.
One solid hit and the generators will fry.
We just don’t have a spare.
Scanners are down, comm is shifty, and
the engines are up and running.
WARD
Excellent.
(to GRIMM REAPER)
Were we able to get a reading
off the Devourer’s wake?
GRIM REAPER
(shaking head)
No. It decayed too fast.
WARD
Damn
What about the AH.com?
GRIM REAPER
The Beacon’s holding steady.
We know where they are…
WARD
Excellent.
Set a course for that universe.
If we can’t find the Devourer, we
might as well destroy one of our foes.
GRIMM REAPER nods ecstatically.
INT.- AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
KIT
Doc. We’re getting some kind of message.
DOCTOR WHAT
On screen.
The screen flares to life, showing a large man.
MAN
You have entered the realm
of the United Imperial Earth.
State your business!
DOCTOR WHAT
Our ship is damaged. We need to make some repairs.
MAN
We cannot allow such foreigners into
our space, prepare to be boarded and
taken into custody.
DOCTOR WHAT
What the fu-
The ship suddenly shakes.
HENDRYK
Internal scans show that there’s a
force landing in the Main Shuttle Bay.
DOCTOR WHAT
Why the hell didn’t we see them?
HENDRYK
Main scanners are down…
DOCTOR WHAT
Damn.
(into com)
MATT!
MATT
Yo?
DOCTOR WHAT
We’re being boarded.
Secure the Main Shuttle Bay.
MATT
On my way, Doc!
INT. AH.COM SHIP – OUTSIDE MAIN SHUTTLE BAY – DAY
MATT, STRAHA, MICHAEL, and OTHNIEL scurry down a corridor, armed.
STRAHA
Lets blow these sons of bitches
out of the air lock!
MATT
They’re already on the ship.
STRAHA
Then we fucking kill them!
MATT
That’s the plan, kid.
They hurry to the Shuttle Bay entrance, when suddenly there’s a loud explosion throwing them all back. MATT staggers to his feet, and watches as several amored figures march out of the door.
MATT
Shit!
(opens fire)
MICHAEL moves around on his hands and knees, reaching a groaning STRAHA crumpled up against a bulkhead. He notices OTHNIEL lying in a heap.
MICHAEL
(into comm)
Diamond! Get your ass down here!
Now!
MATT continues to fight the armored figures.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – ENGINEERING BAY– DAY
DAVE HOWERY and PSYCHOMELTDOWN are hunched over a monitor, behind them smoke rises and red lights are flashing.
DAVE HOWERY
Man. I don’t like the look of this.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
Look of what?
The whole damn ship falling apart?
Or the core running redline for the last hour?
DAVE HOWERY
No. My reflection. That small fire singed
my luxurious beard, now it’s uneven.
You don’t happen to have a pair of
scissors do you?
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
Er… No.
I think we have bigger problems at the moment.
DAVE HOWERY
Fine. Fine.
Suddenly the ship rocks and DAVE HOWERY and PSYCHOMELTDOWN are sent flying across the Engineering Room.
The sound of something snapping fills the rooma nd suddenly steam gushes from a broken pipe.
DAVE HOWERY
Aw, crap.
I thought I fixed that.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
Duct taping is not fixing.
DAVE HOWERY
It usually works.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
And we wonder why our ship looks like crap.
DAVE HOWERY
Hey, at least it’s still flying.
Er… was still flying.
A alarm begins blaring, DAVE HOWERY and PSYCHOMELTDOWN rush to another monitor.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
Shit.
DAVE HOWERY
Aw, hell. Looks like the venting system
from the reactor just crapped out.
(Dave hits various buttons)
The auto vent’s not working.
Crap.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
What are we gonna do?
DAVE HOWERY
We gotta get to the manual release,
vent the theta radiation and pray to
whatever gods you believe in that
the core doesn’t go critical.
Suddenly the ship rocks again, and another alarm begins blaring again, this time the Engineering Bay is flooded with red light and screaming sirens.
DAVE HOWERY
Radiation leak!
Get out of the Reactor Room.
It’s gonna be sealed off.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
But the vents?
DAVE HOWERY
You wanna die?
If we don’t get out now,
we’ll be dead!
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
If we just leave, the radiation is going
to flood this whole ship. And we’ll be
all dead. Not to mention the reactor
could go critical if the radiation isn’t vented!
DAVE HOWERY
Shit.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
Go. I’ll open the manual vent.
DAVE HOWERY
Oh, hell no.
You’re not going to do something
brave while I’m around. I’m the
Chief Engineer, I do the crazy brave
stuff, not my kickrarounds.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
You know more about this ship than me.
It’s about who’s more useful, now. If
you’re incapacitated, then G.Bone and I
can’t fix the ship as well as you can.
So you’re needed.
DAVE HOWERY
(stroking singed beard)
You’re right…
Suddenly the siren changes pitch. There’s a groaning noise and a heavy blast door begins sliding down, separating the reactor from the rest of the ship.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN
Go!
DAVE HOWERY hurries out as the heavy doors slid down. He looks in from a small window.
PSYCHOMELTDOWN rushes over to a large machine that’s labeled: MANUAL VENT. He begins hitting some buttons, the lighting of the room changes.
DAVE HOWERY
No! No!
You idiot! That’s the light control.
The vent control is to the left!
PSCYHOMELTDOWN gives a thumbs up, moving over to another computer console. He hits buttons and suddenly a large lever pops up. He pulls it down.
DAVE HOWERY rushes over to a monitor and it displays; SECONDARY VENTING INITIATED. He rushes back to the small window and sees PSYCHOMELTDOWN collapsed upon the floor.
DAVE HOWERY
Aw, hell.
(opens comm unit)
Diamond! Get your ass down here, ASAP!
DIAMOND (on comm)
I’m kind of in a fucking situation here!
(sounds of gunfire)
DAVE HOWERY stares into the Engineering Room.
DAVE HOWERY
Aw, hell.
DAVE HOWERY hits a button upon the door marked: MANUAL RELEASE.
Cut to:
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – OUTSIDE MAIN SHUTTLE BAY – DAY
The sound of gunfire fills the air, Pan toward a group of figures huddled behind a barricade, exchanging fire with a large group of armored figures.
Pan to DIAMOND who’s applying bandages to an unconscious OTHNEIL, a bandaged and stunned looking STRAHA leans up against a bulkhead, arm in sling and clothing bloodied.
MATT
Shit.
We can’t hold this position.
MICHAEL
This is a bloody right fucked mess.
Where in the hell are the others?
DIAMOND
They said there was another attempt
to board the ship from the secondary bay.
They’ll be here in a minute.
The bulkhead above DIAMOND gets shredded by incoming fire.
MICHAEL
Hope they come friggin’ soon.
There’s a sudden yelling and several armored men begin running toward the barricade, firing as they come. MATT, MICHAEL, and DIAMOND open fire upon them.
MICHAEL suddenly lets out a yell, falling backward and withering from a hit. DIAMOND immediately moves to him, opening his med pouch. MATT takes care of the last charging soldier.
MATT
Damn it.
We gotta fall back.
Straha, grab Othniel.
Diamond grab Michael.
I’ll cover your retreat.
The two grab the injured pair and begin dragging. MATT suddenly rises up, firing away at the armored figures. DIAMOND keeps dragging, suddenly knocking into something. He turns around and sees IRON YUPPIE, LANDSHARK, ABDUL HADI PASHA, and DMA.
IRON YUPPIE
Any of the boys with toys left?
LANDSHARK
Oi, what’s with the depressed and
“we’re gonna die” look. The bloody
cavalry’s here to save your sorry arses.
ABDUL HADI PASHA
Move it, people.
Matt’s in trouble.
(cocks assault rifle)
DMA
Jihad!
(runs into the fight)
IRON YUPPIE
You gotta love his enthusiasm.
LANDSHARK
‘Course he’s gotta come up
with a better line than “Jihad”.
DIAMOND just shakes his head and STRAHA and he continue to drag the unconscious crew members down the battered corridor.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
The Control Room is tense and we can see GREY WOLF and GBW busily trying to repair a computer console.
The Main Viewscreen is shot through with static. On it are shown the Imperial ships swarming like little bugs.
KIT
Doc, there’s heavy comm traffic.
Seems the Imperials are gathering
their forces for a full on attack.
DOCTOR WHAT
Damn.
(into comm)
Hey, Lee. How long with that cannon?
Cut to:
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – WEAPONS CONTROL AREA – DAY
WEAPON M and THANDE are hunched over fixing a large device labeled: MAIN WEAPONS CONTROL.
WEAPON M
Give us a couple of minutes, Doc.
This thing’s fried to hell and gone.
DOCTOR WHAT
We’re running out of time here.
We need the weapons up and running…
WEAPON M
We hear you. But there’s no choice in the matter.
DOCTOR WHAT
Just get it done. Quickly.
THANDE
Damn it. I work with chemicals,
not bloody damned machines!
WEAPON M
Chill, Thande.
We’ll get it working.
WEAPON M inserts a chip and suddenly the consoles flares to life. WEAPON M gives THANDE a thumbs up sign.
WEAPON M (into comm)
Weapons are a go, Doc.
Fire away at the fucking bastards!
Cut to:
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
HENDRYK
Doc. Weapons online!
DOCTOR WHAT
Aim for the first ship and begin firing.
HENDRYK
(happily)
I’ve always wanted to do this.
EXT. – SPACE – DAY
Light fires from the AH.com ship, slicing through the Imperial Ships flying in their direction. They begin blossoming into flames.
Cut to:
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
KIT
Dave’s reporting that the ship’s in system
drives are on line. Shift Engines are still
offline. MATT’s also reporting that the
last of the boarders have been repelled.
The Imperials are calling a retreat on all
remaining ships.
DOCTOR WHAT
Ha. Blast away a couple of
their ships and they go running.
KIT
No. They all got the retreat order moments
before the cannons were activated. It’s strange…
DOCTOR WHAT
Lucky us then.
(to Grey and GBW)
You two finished?
We need to hop skip outta here.
GBW
Almost.
GREY WOLF
The bloody consoles always fucking blow
when you get tapped by a baddie. Damn things.
We should get better ones…
KIT
(scared)
Doc? I’ve snatched up a transmission sent
out to all the Imperial Ships. They’ve got
bigger worries to worry about…
The viewscreen flashes on, showing a huge billowing vortex, almost as if a storm were brewing in space. The Control Room goes quiet as they see what comes out.
GREY WOLF
Aw, bloody hell.
The fucking thing followed us here.
DOCTOR WHAT (into comm)
Dave, you’d better get those Shift Engines
working, for we’ve got unwelcome company.
DAVE HOWERY (on comm)
What? You’re not saying…
Aw, crap. I’m on it.
DOCTOR WHAT (into comm)
G.Bone, hurry up and patch up Leo.
We’re gonna need his brainy power in a moment.
G.Bone (on comm)
Working on it, captain.
This is delicate work!
GBW
(sighing)
What else could happen now?
Suddenly the ship rocks, alarms begin blaring.
HENDRYK
We’re getting hull breaches on several decks.
Something just tore a hole into us.
DOCTOR WHAT
Was it the Devourer?
KIT
(scared)
Doc, we’re getting a transmission.
The screen flares to life and a truly pissed off looking WARD is shown.
WARD
You think you could run?
You think you could make
a repeat of your cowardice?
Well, I’m here to show you
what we do to cowards!
GREY WOLF
(glaring at GBW)
You just had to shoot off your
soddin’ mouth, didn’t you?
DOCTOR WHAT
Uh.. do we have shields?
HENDRYK
No.
DOCTOR WHAT
Aw, shit.
The CF.net begins firing upon the AH.com.
END ACT I
ACT II
INT. – CF.NET SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
WARD is glaring at the viewscreen, showing the AH.com maneuvering and taking shots.
GRIM REAPER
Sir. We’re running the weapons system hot.
Without auto targeting we’re missing five outta seven shots.
WARD
Keep firing.
Destroy them.
GRIM REAPER
Yes, sir.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – COMPUTER CORE – DAY
G.BONE is floating in a large area, the huge pulsing orb that was Leo’s Brain is dead and unpulsing. G.BONE is fiddling with what appears to be chips.
The ship rocks violently, causing him to drop a few, they fly slowly away from him.
G.BONE
(growling)
I said this was delicate work!
I can’t work in these conditions.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
DOCTOR WHAT
Get us out of here, GBW!
GBW
Trying, sir.
I can’t shake them.
Suddenly the ship rocks and the lights dim.
DOCTOR WHAT
What the hell?
GBW
I’ve just lost helm control.
HENDRYK
I’ve lost weapons control.
KIT
Still got comm.
GREY WOLF
I just dropped by scotch!
DOCTOR WHAT (into comm)
Dave, what’s happened?
DAVE HOWERY (on comm)
That last shot just took out our pulse drive.
We aren’t going anywhere. Thursters are gone,
the Shift Engines are still hours of work from now…
GBW
So, we’re just sitting ducks out here?
DOCTOR WHAT
(looking at viewscreen)
Why are they destroying us?
INT. – CF.NET – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
GRIMM REAPER is pounding a dead computer console.
GRIM REAPER
We’ve just lost weapons.
WARD
Damn.
What do we have to destroy them?
GRIM REAPER
(shrugging)
Teleporters are down.
Launch tubes are shot to hell…
(pause)
We could board them?
WARD
Do it!
FAEELIN
Sir. We’re getting a transmission from the AH.com.
Shall I patch it through?
WARD
Go ahead. I want to see What
beg for his life, before I kill him.
INT.- AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
GREY WOLF
Just don’t beg for your life.
DOCTOR WHAT
How many times do I have to tell you?
I’m not begging for my life.
GREY WOLF
Just making sure…
KIT
We’re patched in.
WARD appears upon the screen. DOCTOR WHAT stands up straight.
DOCTOR WHAT
I see you survived.
WARD
I see you ran, like the coward you are.
DOCTOR WHAT
I think we have bigger issues than
my leaving the scene of battle.
Though I did not flee.
WARD
Quit your stalling.
DOCTOR WHAT
If your communication officer will scan the
local frequencies, he’ll notice something
going on. It seems we have a mutual enemy
that’s arrived to this universe also.
WARD talks off screen for a moment, when he comes back he still looks angry, but this time not directed at DOCTOR WHAT.
WARD
This means nothing. Only that I’ll
destroy the Thing after I destroy you.
DOCTOR WHAT
We still want this Devourer destroyed, same as you.
We’re willing to work with you to destroy it.
We also still have an A.S.S.H.A.T. left.
WARD
(long pause)
It looks like we have a few things to discuss…
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – MED BAY – DAY
TORQUMADA is stripping off bloodied gloves while DIAMOND is taking a fortifying shot of medicinal brandy.
TORQUMADA
There’s a reason that I love
futuristic medical equipment.
So much better than just hacking
away at a person’s body parts.
DIAMOND nods, taking another fortifying shot.
DOCTOR WHAT enters.
DOCTOR WHAT
How are they?
TORQUMADA
(nodding to Dr. What)
Psycho’s got a major case of
Radiation poisoning, We’ve
given him meds and he’ll be
okay, if we get the medical
equipment here working.
Othniel’s suffering form a
concussion and a couple of
shrapnel wounds, he’ll be okay.
Michael, we had to dig a couple
of bullets outta him. Messy stuff.
DOCTOR WHAT
And Straha?
TORQUMADA
Broken arm and from what I can tell,
shell shock. A couple of meds and
a few days rest should take care of that.
DOCTOR WHAT walks among the battered crewmembers, shaking his head.
DOCTOR WHAT
A miracle we didn’t lose anyone.
TORQUMADA
I had Psycho’s name in the pool
as the crew member to die in this battle.
DOCTOR WHAT
There’s was a pool?
DIAMOND
I had Straha…
(sighs)
DOCTOR WHAT looks at the unconscious members again and shakes his head.
DOCTOR WHAT
Make sure they’re comfortable. We’re still
not out of the fight yet. The Big Bad’s just
followed us here, along with Ward.
DIAMOND
(takes fortifying shot of medicinal brandy)
Damn.
TORQUMADA
(offers Doctor What a shot of medicinal brandy)
Of all the missions you’ve taken us on,
this has to be the shittiest one.
DOCTOR WHAT
(takes fortifying shot of medicinal brandy)
You’re telling me.
KIT
Doc. Ward’s arrived on board.
DOCTOR WHAT (into comm)
On my way.
(turns to leave, then stops)
Thanks for taking care of my crew, Torq.
You too, Diamond.
DIAMOND
It’s cool, Cap’n.
TORQUMADA
No problem, Doc. Just kill this
thing and we’ll call it even, alright?
DOCTOR WHAT
Consider it done.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – MAIN SHUTTLE BAY – DAY
WARD, GRIMM, DRACONIS NOIR, and N-RED walk from a shuttle, the latter two are heavily armed. DOCTOR WHAT, GREY WOLF, MATT, and WEAPON M head toward them, the latter two are also heavily armed.
DOCTOR WHAT
Let’s discuss our options.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – BATTLE ROOM – DAY
DOCTOR WHAT
The fight we engaged in against the Devourer
managed to eliminate most of it’s fighter escorts.
WARD
It still has it’s own personal defenses
and weapons. What do you think took
out the ‘Verse Crosser?
DOCTOR WHAT
We’ve managed to hurt it and
it’s managed to hurt us.
GREY WOLF
That’s a goddamn understatement,
if I’ve ever heard one.
GRIM REAPER
We still have weapons and minimal shields.
Same as you.
WARD
I get it your launching system is also shot to hell?
DOCTOR WHAT
Yeah.
GRIM REAPER
We can’t launch the A.S.S.H.A.T.
We can’t teleport it.
What are our options?
DOCTOR WHAT thinks for a moment and then smiles.
DOCTOR WHAT
(to Grey Wolf)
Do we still have that dinky
ship we captured last time?
(he nods)
I think I have an idea…
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
KIT
I don’t see why you’re the one who has to do this?
DOCTOR WHAT
I’m the captain, I make the decisions.
KIT
Can’t you use one of the cannon fodder?
Take GBW, he’s almost useless.
GBW
Hey, I’d take offense if it weren’t so true!
DOCTOR WHAT
No. I must do this myself.
KIT
No you don’t. You’re just being stupidly brave.
Get over yourself!
DOCTOR WHAT
(smiles briefly)
I have to do this.
KIT
(glaring)
Bastard.
(stalks off)
GREY WOLF
I’ll hold the ship while you’re gone.
DOCTOR WHAT
I trust you, Grey.
GREY WOLF
Fuck.
Guess that’ll me I can’t drink.
(tosses aside flask)
DOCTOR WHAT
See you all in a bit, after we kill this thing.
Beer’s on me at the Pub.
GBW
‘bout time you actually bought a round!
DOCTOR WHAT smiles and heads off into the Lift.
GREY WOLF
(to crew)
Get yer arses to work.
I want all systems on go when this shit starts.
If What buys it out there, I’m holding
you fuckards responsible, hear?
CREW
Yes, sir!
INT. AH.COM SHIP – MAIN CARGO BAY – DAY
A vast room, filled with storage containers. In one corner a lot of people are gathered, busily moving items. Pull in and we see, G.BONE, DAVE HOWERY, GEDCA, FORTYSEVEN, and FEDERATION X.
FORTYSEVEN
Where’s Psycho?
G.BONE
Med Bay. Radiation Poisoning.
FEDERATION X
Ouch. That sucks.
GEDCA
Can’t believe you all have
this stuff in storage.
DAVE HOWERY
(smugly)
Got replacements for every
major system on this ship.
GEDCA
Why?
DAVE HOWERY
Hell, we’ve had our ship trashed in
almost every universe we arrived at.
We’ve been shot, nearly blown up,
our ship nearly taken over a couple of times.
(shakes head)
Give us a couple of days after a fight
and we’ll be good as new again.
GEDCA
Thanks for letting us snag a few parts.
DAVE HOWERY
Not much call for spare parts, huh?
GEDCA
We don’t get our asses kicked.
Long pause.
DAVE HOWERY
Right.
INT. AH.COM SHIP – MAIN SHUTTLE BAY – DAY
Debris and scorched marks litter the Shuttle Bay. DOCTOR WHAT and WEAPON M walk around a small craft.
WEAPON M
Always wondered why
we never used this thing.
DOCTOR WHAT
Mainly cuz it’s wanted
in nearly fifty universes.
WEAPON M
Aw, well. She works fine. We’ve
loaded her up and she’s set to go.
DOCTOR WHAT
Good.
WEAPON M
Here.
(hands Dr. What a device)
DOCTOR WHAT
What’s this?
WEAPON M
It’s a locator. Leo’s tracking system’s
a bit on the fritz. We might mistaken
your ship for that of the enemy.
So locator.
DOCTOR WHAT
Cool.
WEAPON M
Hell, we could track you into another
universe with it, if we wanted.
DOCTOR WHAT
I won’t be in another universe.
A silence descends
WEAPON M
You sure you want to do this?
DOCTOR WHAT
(looks about)
Hell no. But it has to be done.
WEAPON M
Right.
Best of luck to you, Doc.
We’ll keep that bitch off your
back so you can fuck it in the ass.
(grins)
Heh. At least you’re good at that.
DOCTOR WHAT
(mock outrage)
That’s slanderous lies, Lee.
Good luck to you guys.
WEAPON M
Nah. You’ll be doing the hard part.
We’ll just be out there poking the bull.
The two shake hand and part ways. DOCTOR WHAT entering the small ship.
EXT. – SPACE – DAY
We see the ship leave the AH.com and with a blast of it’s engines is lost in the darkness of space.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
HENDRYK
Doc’s just left the ship.
GREY WOLF
Inform Ward and begin the plan.
GBW
Course set.
LEO
Weapons ready and armed.
DAVE HOWERY (on comm)
We’re ready as we’ll ever be down here.
TORQUMADA (on comm)
Patients secured.
Just don’t get us blown up, Grey.
GREY WOLF
Sure and maybe I’ll pull a
unicorn outta my arse.
KIT
Ward’s acknowledge.
Entering attack vector.
LANDSHARK
Damn, here we go again…
EXT. – SPACE – DAY
A long shot of the earth, the two ships, the Devourer, and scores of Imperial ships still battling away at the Devourer. Light blossoms from the Devourer, striking down at the planet below.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
KIT
Oh my. The Imperial ships
are taking a major beating…
GREY WOLF
Begin attack approach, power to
defensive screens and weapons!
EXT. – SPACE – DAY
The two ships blaze their way toward the ship, both battered.
A spherical ship is chasing after an Imperial ship; suddenly it explodes into debris as the cannons of the CF.net open up. A barrage is sent against the Devourer. The Ah.com commences bombardment, the two ships begin maneuvers as a lance of pure white light shoots out at their position.
The two ships are weaving in and out of the Imperial Ships, firing their cannons upon the Devourer. Small spherical ships disengage from attacking the Imperial ships and begin giving chase.
Lances of light strike upon the hulls of the ships, bits and pieces falling off. They fire back, shredding the spherical ships. The spherical ships are giving chase now, the Imperial ships swarm the Devourer, but they get cut down, one by one.
INT. – COCKPIT OF THE SMALL SHIP – DAY
DOCTOR WHAT intently watches the scanner before him, watching as Imperial ships explode, spherical vessels detonate, and the two ships fending off the swarm of spherical ships.
DOCTOR WHAT hits a couple of buttons on the console before him and the ship begins to surge forward.
DOCTOR WHAT
Here we go.
He looks back and we see the A.S.S.H.A.T.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
Sparks shower from a shattered console, the light is dim, and everyone’s clutching to whatever surface they can, as the ship shakes violently with hits.
GREY WOLF
How long?
WEAPON M
Shields down to forty percent.
Weapons running hot.
GBW
Dave’s having problems with the
pulse engines. They’re being overworked.
HENDRYK
Doc’s ship is moving in.
GREY WOLF
Oh, thank god.
WEAPON M
Aw, crap.
The Devourer’s firing upon Doc…
EXT. – SPACE – DAY
The Devourer begins firing at the small ship. The small ship moves gracefully, avoiding the lances of light and continues to plow toward the Devourer.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
WEAPON M
Ward’s firing his main cannon!
A flash of light fills the screen.
It clears and the crew begins cheering as they see a series of explosions rock the hull of the Devourer.
HENDRYK
Reading damages along the outer hull.
Their weapons are off line.
GREY WOLF
Take us in for an attack, all wea-
A blast of white light suddenly hits the ship, alarms begin ringing and the ship comes to a stop.
GREY WOLF
What the hell?
DAVE HOWERY (on comm)
We’ve just lost pulse drives!
We’ve just lost shields.
We’ve just lost weapons!
We’re fucked.
GREY WOLF
Aw, hell…
EXT. – SPACE – DAY
A white light flashes again.
Suddenly a ship appears between them and the light. The CF.net. The white light hits them full on and they’re suddenly adrift like the AH.com. small explosions can be seen erupting from their hull.
The Devourer seems to ignore them, instead it begins firing upon the small ship that’s still speeding it’s way toward it. With a single cannon it fires repeatedly, the small ship dodging the blasts.
Suddenly a blast strikes out, the small ship barely manages to maneuver out of the way, but it gets grazed. The small ship spins, out of control.
As if a last gasp, the CF.net belches out another blast, destroying the last cannon of the Devourer.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
KIT
Doc!
Doc!
Are you alirght?
DOCTOR WHAT (on comm)
(heavy with static)
Yeah. I’m here.
Ship got grazed, no control…
GREY WOLF
Just arm the A.S.S.H.A.T. and
teleport your arse off the ship.
DOCTOR WHAT
Can’t. The teleporters are shot…
KIT
What?
No.
No.
GREY WOLF
We’ll launch a shuttle to get you.
DOCTOR WHAT
No. The Devourer is already repairing
itself. I can see it from here. It’ll be
minutes before it’s functioning again…
GREY WOLF
You can’t stay on that bloody ship.
It’s gonna blow!
DOCTOR WHAT
(softly)
I know…
KIT
No.
Doc, don’t do this.
Don’t be stupid.
(into intercom)
MATT get a friggin’ shuttle
ready and get the Doc!
DOCTOR WHAT
Kit, no.
Too many people have been hurt and
have died because of this thing. I’m
not letting anyone die to try and save me.
No.
KIT
But, Doc…
DOCTOR WHAT
No.
GREY WOLF
Damn it, Bruno.
What the hell are we going to do?
DOCTOR WHAT
(long pause)
Take care of the ship. Take care of one another.
I said it before. We’re all family. We’ve been
through a lot. We’ve seen a lot. A ragged bunch
of people, when you all came on board. Now look
at you. You’re heroes, everyone of you. Be proud
of that and remember it. You’ve faced something
today that very little people would willingly face.
You stood up against a great evil and now we’ve
fought it to a standstill. I’m proud to have had the
opportunity to be on a ship with you all.
(a long pause)
This is where our paths separate, but one day
we may all end up together again, in another
universe. In another place.
KIT
Doc..
Don’t.
DOCTOR WHAT
(heavy static)
I can see it now. The Devourer
is almost finished repairing itself.
You guys be good.
(hastily)
And no one touch my porn!
KIT
Doc!
Nothing.
INT. – COCKPIT OF THE SMALL SHIP – DAY
DOCTOR WHAT walks toward the back of the ship and flips a switch upon the A.S.S.H.A.T.. A counter begins, counting down from 10.
9…
8…
He sighs, leaning against it.
DOCTOR WHAT
Damn. They’re gonna get into my porn…
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
7…
6…
KIT
(screaming)
Someone!
Rescue him!
Please…
INT. – COCKPIT OF THE SMALL SHIP – DAY
DOCTOR WHAT looks around and grins to himself. He straddles the A.S.S.H.A.T..
DOCTOR WHAT
I’ll ride this fucker in.
5…
4…
3…
2…
1…
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – CONTROL ROOM – DAY
A suddenly violet shockwave encompasses the screen, washing out everything.
The crew stands there, unable to say anything.
Utter silence.
KIT
No…
END ACT II
TAG
MONTAGE
CREW REPAIRING THE SHIP
Dave leading the crew to patch up the hull and the engines.
Parts being taken out of storage.
Welding sparks as things are patched up.
CLEANING THE INTERIOR
the rest of the crew tear down battered bulkheads and scrub away marks of fire and fighting.
CREW VISITING THE INJURED
The crew is gathered in the Med Bay, laughing, talking, and drinking with those that were injured in the fighting on the ship.
THE TWO CREWS SHAKING HANDS
The crew of the CF.net and the AH.com are shaking hands as they make their farewells.
WARD
(to Grey Wolf)
He died bravely.
GREY WOLF only nods, unable to say anything.
Fade to black.
OVER BLACK
MAN (Voice Over)
To say that he was our leader, does not describe him.
To say that he was a great man, does not describe him.
INT. – AH.COM SHIP – LARGE TEMPLE – DAY
HENDRYK is standing upon a raised step, talking to the gathered AH.com crew, before him is a picture of a grinning DOCTOR WHAT.
HENDRYK
He was our friend.
He was our comrade.
He was our brother.
He was there when we needed him,
He was there when times were tough.
He never let us down.
( a pause)
In the end he gave his life for us.
He made a sacrifice so that we all
should live. Remember him. Who
he was and what he did. For there are
few men like him in the Multiverse.
(Hendryk looks at everyone, taking them all in)
Remember this.
(long pause)
Doctor What died once.
And he rose up again.
FADE TO BLACK
ROLL END CREDITS
